My friend and colleague Jenny Gaitelband had a conversation with me for the Wildspire podcast while living in a war zone.
Here’s some of what we explored:
- What if fear isn’t the enemy?
- The worst time to make a decision
- True safety isn’t where you think it is. Jenny reveals where real safety comes from.
- What do people regret most at the end of life?
- A surprising lesson from a dirty tooth
Listen on the podcast:
The Unexpected Lesson of a Dirty Tooth
Fear has a way of sneaking up on us in the most unexpected moments. For me, it was while brushing my teeth. I noticed a strange gray film on one of them, and suddenly, my mind spiraled. Was something wrong with me? What would people think? It was a small thing, really, but fear doesn’t always need a big reason to show up.
I took that moment into a deep conversation with my guest, Jenny Gaitelband, a mentor and coach for CEOs and managers. Jenny, speaking from her home in Israel during a time of war, has an intimate relationship with fear. And yet, rather than avoiding it, she has learned to walk with it.
The Human Desire to Belong
“Fear comes with thoughts. ‘Do I have a shelter nearby? Have I done everything I can to stay safe?’ But beyond that, there is a moment where we must surrender—to recognize what is out of our hands and allow it to bring us fully into the present.” – Jenny Gaitelband
Jenny reflected on the universality of fear and how, at its core, it is often about wanting to be accepted, loved, and valued. We fear rejection. We fear uncertainty. We fear not being enough. But the presence of fear doesn’t mean something is wrong. In fact, it’s part of being human.
She shared how courage isn’t about eliminating fear, but about feeling it and walking forward anyway.
Walking with Fear Like a Friend
“Courage is to talk with fear like a good friend.” – Jenny Gaitelband
One of the most striking things Jenny said was that courage is about making fear a companion rather than an enemy. “Fear comes with thoughts,” she said. “Do I have a shelter nearby? Have I done everything I can to stay safe?” But beyond that, there is a moment where we must surrender, to recognize what is out of our hands and allow it to bring us fully into the present.
Jenny’s perspective comes from living in a place where the threat to life is real every day. Yet, she doesn’t let fear consume her. Instead, she allows it to be a reminder: to love, to be present, to appreciate what is here, right now.
The Worst Time to Act
“When we are in a dark, anxious place, that is the worst time to make decisions.” – Jenny Gaitelband
We often feel an urgency to act when we’re in fear. But Jenny pointed out something powerful: when we are in a dark, anxious place, that is the worst time to make decisions.
I shared the example of a woman on a train, anxiously trying to coordinate moving her pets from Brazil to Portugal. At one point, the woman paused and said, “I know I don’t make good decisions when I’m anxious. We’ve done all we can for now. Let’s see what happens.”
It was a beautiful example of self-awareness, the recognition that fear clouds judgment and that sometimes the best action is to do nothing at all until clarity returns.
The Safest Place to Be
Jenny and I talked about safety—not just physical safety, but the illusion of safety we create. We tell ourselves that money, status, or stability will make us safe, but life often shows us otherwise. True safety, she suggested, comes from being present.
A quote from Michael Neill summed it up perfectly: “99.99% of the time, here is the safest place to be. And in the 0.01% of times where there is a clear and present danger, being fully here is the best way to find the safe path forward.”
Meet Jenny Gaitelband, Mentor & Coach
Jenny Gaitelband is a mentor and coach for managers and CEOs to move from burnout and high stress to finding clarity and meaning in a tailor-made life and career.
She is a member of the European Organization for Psychotherapy EABP, graduate of the Coaching Academy in Canada and Wingate college for sports trainers. Jenny has 12 years and over 10,000 hours of experience in therapy, supervision and coaching individual and groups.
Connect with Jenny
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenny-gaitelband/
Subscribe for new podcast updates : https://www.theawakenedbusiness.com/wildspire-podcast/
