Talking about doing business without the rules is dangerous.
Not dangerous in a you-could-get-eaten-by-tigers or beaten-with-a-spatula kind of way, but because even NOT following the rules can get turned into a rule.
When I challenge what the experts say you “have to do” for success:
- Social media marketing
- Targeting your niche
- Agitating pain points to make sales
- Create a website/webinar/email nurture sequence/lead magnet/signature program, etc.
- Do the hard inner work of transformation
I’m not saying you shouldn’t do these things.
You might choose to do them. You might choose not.
They may get results, and if they light you up, go for it!
What I’m urging you to do is QUESTION the status quo and get CURIOUS about the rules.
Do you really want to do this?
Is it aligned with what’s important to you?
Is it necessary, just because an appointed expert says so?
How would you do it, if you could do it ANY way?
Here’s a confession:
I’m not a rebel.
I dated a rebel in high school. He simply HAD to rebel against anything you told him to do, even if he wanted to do it in the first place.
Nope. That’s not me.
But I can’t seem to keep myself from looking for exceptions, and it seems useful to talk about the exceptions to the rule…if only to point out that the rules are entirely MADE UP.
The minute someone says you “have to” do something, or talks about how that will “never” work, I’m saying:
“Oh, REALLY?”
If I can find even one exception, it’s worth noting, because I think we can all use a little more permission to do it our way.
Hell, we don’t even get much encouragement to explore what our way might be, let alone follow it!
We’re busy comparing ourselves to everyone else, and doubting our own intuition (I’ll get back to that in a bit) because the rules look so damn compelling, that it’s worth knocking the rules out of the equation, just to see what happens.
If you no longer have to play by the rules, and you get to make it up, what would that be like?
This is how it looks to me:
When I’m wondering (and stressing out or worrying) about what to do next, it’s like I’m in a dust storm of stinky thinking. It’s really hard to hear anything besides my frenzied thoughts.
But when it settles, underneath is this quiet voice of wisdom that’s more like a feeling, letting me know the very next thing to do.
Have you had a similar experience?
I’ve yet to meet a person who doesn’t find this quiet knowing underneath all the thinking piled on top of it.
A client-playmate comes to me with her stuckness, and we talk. As we get curious and begin to question the truth of these very real seeming thoughts, something shifts.
A space opens up and…she KNOWS. Something.
Even if she isn’t quite sure she can trust it yet.
Then there’s this beautiful DANCE we get to do within, outside or beyond the rules.
You get to make up the moves. It’s alive and it’s yours.
A Beautiful Mess
Two years ago I was DEEP in learning about psychology, human behavior and spirituality.
Neuro-linguistic programming. The Three Principles. Access Consciousness. Practical magic.
I dove into all these at the same time, despite the fact that their worldviews are vastly different or even contradictory.
I allowed them to flow through me, and didn’t get stuck trying to sift the true from the false.
My wisdom knew. The bits I needed were right there, and the rest could just drop away.
This in contrast to my old way, which was to follow each teaching as Gospel truth.
This doesn’t seem necessary anymore.
I’m wondering what would happen if you know that you could do that, too?
You can take the pieces of what you’ve been taught that seem true and useful, and drop the ones that don’t.
You can explore any terrain freely, trusting that you’ll know what’s aligned and what isn’t.
The truth is that you already have what you really seek, and with that inner navigation system to guide you, anything external will be a reflection of that inner knowing.
In other words, when the student is ready, the teacher can’t NOT appear, because you are student and teacher, both.
You’ve got this, because you’ve got YOU.
Much as this is your truly natural state, it can be helpful to have a guide in trusting what you know again.
It isn’t difficult, though, because once you see how easy and fun it can be to be led by your inner knowing, instead of buffeted by the hustle and chase, you’ll choose it naturally.
I currently have 3 openings for a six-month coaching and messaging journey for experienced coaches, healers and wellness practitioners working 1:1 with me to connect to your inner wisdom and create your business outside the box.
We craft irresistible messaging woven with your deep purpose, mission and genius gifts to attract your soulmate clients, and discover your authentic way of reaching them with joyful un-marketing. No hype or endless social media posting required.
This is best suited for good writers and/or speakers who love sharing what they know, and who are ready to create something BIG. It’s currently priced at the mid-four figures, with monthly payment options. Contact me if this sounds like you, or if you’re curious, and we’ll have a chat to see what emerges. 🙂
Yours in creative play,
Steph
